Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Black tongue

Last night I splurged while grocery shopping and bought some new coffee. (And I STILL stuck to my food budget for the week.) Well, really it was Roundy's brand. And it wasn't any special flavor or anything. It's "Venetian" or something like that, described as spicy with dark chocolate undertones. Whatever, it's coffee. But that's besides the point.

Anyway, since I haven't made my own coffee in well over two weeks, I was really excited to brew my own pot.

Measured by sight, I dumped some ground coffee into a filter, filled up the pot and pushed "start." MMMM, I don't even have to drink the stuff... just the smell is enough to wake me up.

Carrying on with my morning routine, I chop up veggies, started my omelet and cut my grapefruit. But oh, the anticipation. The overwhelming aroma! The ultimate complement to any breakfast.

I couldn't take it anymore. Once done brewing, I poured a steaming hot cup into my favorite chipped-handle mug, added some creamer, and took a huge gulp.

Many will tell you my tolerance for hot drinks is impeccable, but MY GOD. Instead of java bliss, my entire mouth experienced a scalding sensation. This wasn't coffee, it was boiling lava blistering my tongue and gums.

After swishing ice-cold water, I waited another five minutes before eating breakfast and drinking the rest of my coffee. Except I didn't enjoy it, because I couldn't taste anything. I still can't taste anything.

6 comments:

Ric said...

This was my last paragraph initially:

"It's almost as bad as eating a slice of pizza fresh from the oven, when the cheese slides off just as you're taking your first bite, just in time for piping-hot sauce to explode all over your mouth. Almost as bad."

Before posting, I realized it was a pretty strong innuendo.

Shawn Connelly said...

what innuendo.... please do explain.

Gregor said...

Ahahah, Reason #232 why you're actually 6 years old: No patience when it comes to hot food/drink.

Unknown said...

You know, you say that you have a high tolerance for hot things, but there are SOOOO many occasions where you take a sip or a bite of something and go "OH HOH", the T is silent because you aren't able to close your mouth for fear that the heat will accumulate to quickly and your mouth will explode sending your lower jaw flying to the ground.

and this is actually reason #2325 if you've known her as long as I have. Amazing how fast that list grows isn't it Gregor?

Unknown said...

and on a second note, why would biting into hot pizza be a strong innuendo. Sauce explosion, check, but not unless you are really kinky does cheese sliding off before you take a bite have any innuendo power...if it does for you, please don't tell me any more details.

Ric said...

Well, referring to the piping-hot sauce exploding all over your mouth. If that can't be taken the wrong way, I'm not sure what can.

AHAHA. That's exactly what I do when I eat hot food. GODDAMMIT. I have no patience.

And what, praytell, is #2324?